


Ache

by depugnare



Series: Never Gonna Be a Whole Fic [8]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Gen, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), catfa, the ice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-20
Updated: 2016-07-20
Packaged: 2018-07-25 13:51:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7535278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/depugnare/pseuds/depugnare
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He sees ghosts. Everywhere he turns in this bright future they watch him.</p><p> Buildings could be skeletons, the roads veins.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ache

I wonder if staring through the glass at Bucky, eyes closed and face smooth as he sleeps, Steve aches for the ice.

The quiet, broken only by the shifting of glaciers. 

Where he dreamed of weary grey eyes and red lipped smiles, the same tune humming through his mind over and over again -for I must leave thee, Do not let this parting grieve thee, And remember that the best of friends must part, must part. Remember that the best of friends must part, remember, remember- He does not remember a time before yearning.

It had not been so bad, until the dug him from the ice and his dreams became ones of teeth clenched in death throes and grief-stricken cries. Until his memories kept melding together, real ones torn apart by the versions that had played across his vision as the ground hurtled towards him-too fast, too fast, this is my choice, snow and rock and mountains, freezing water, blood, wait this isn’t- and one last thought that still tore his heart apart with want.

I will see you again.

He sees ghosts. Everywhere he turns in this bright future they watch him. Buildings could be skeletons, the roads veins. The ache in his heart haunts him most of all, climbing up his throat to fill his mouth with grief. He hungers, but what would fill his lungs with air again has died. There is no use opening your eyes when met with such haunted visions, better to sleep and let the dead consume.

He stares through the glass at Bucky and hungers. He has changed, but there is no mistaking that nose, the bow of his lips. That is James Buchanan Barnes, the only one who still remembers a kid from Brooklyn. The only one who remembers the sharp bones that covered an angry heart trying to be good. Steve is ravenous for his own history, the truth of which is unknown to all but two. The ghosts are crying out for one of their own, the man who sleeps and holds the past inside him. They want to eat him whole.

Steve is not so sure he hasn’t become one of them.


End file.
